Conceiving after loss: 'You can never replace a child' –

Conceiving after loss: ‘You can never replace a child’ –

Van Gogh's Fantasies of Replacement: Being a Double and a Twin — Blum 57 6: 1311 — Journal of the American Psychoanalytic Association

Van Gogh’s Fantasies of Replacement: Being a Double and a Twin — Blum 57 6: 1311 — Journal of the American Psychoanalytic Association.

I love this one!

Listen to the Newest Discussion for Replacement Child on Syndicated Radio Show

Last week I had the pleasure of talking with Kim Iverson of Your Time with Kim on her syndicated radio program, broadcast in nine metro areas.  We talked about some misconceptions out there about replacement children and how parents can avoid some of the negative effects on children they decide to have after losing a child.  Briefly, we touched on the Travolta/Preston news that they are expecting–wishing them the best with adding to their family.

You can listen to this latest discussion here.  Thanks for tuning in! Let me know your thoughts about it on the blog.

Watch a Reading of Replacement Child

In April, I was invited to read from my book Replacement Child at Central Connecticut State University. You can watch the video of that reading here. Just scroll down the page to the video.

Hope you enjoy it!


Reading the news that John Travolta and Kelly Preston are expecting a baby a little over a year after the death of their 16-year old son Jett made me think of my own parents’ decision to have another child after losing their eldest daughter.  I am that ‘replacement child’ and though many people don’t like the term–it doesn’t have to be a bad thing.

John Travolta and Kelly Preston can prepare to welcome this new child into their family as a unique individual and cherished addition to their family.  With awareness of some of the possible pitfalls, Travolta and Preston can mitigate possible negative effects of being a replacement child as their child grows up.  Although there may be no ‘getting over’ the devastating loss of a child, a new baby may help Travolta and Preston emerge from their grief and can be a source of healing.

I know there have been several blog comments in the last couple of days about the news, and about Kelly Preston being 47 years old–but that is really none of anyone’s business but Travolta and Preston’s! I’m sure there are plenty of over 40 women right now saying “better you than me” thinking of childbirth and caring for a newborn. I say if Kelly Preston is up for it, we should applaud her!

I wish them all the best, and my hope is that this new child never feels like a replacement child at all.  That is totally within the power of Travolta and Preston’s attitude and understanding.